Gratitude,Gave me a sigh of Relief. 

Namaste Everyone, 

Every body nowdays talks about Gratitude.I used to think I am not successful in any possible sense..I am pretty average or may be below average..in everything I have..I am not  professionally successful..I belong to a normal family..I am not super talented or even talented in some sense.. I don't own a legacy or family fortune..What should I be thank

ful for??What is this Gratitude?It is the sense of being thankful or having a sense of appreciation for things we already have or given to us somehow..

GRATITUDE... If we start feeling it, Feeling it from the Heart ..Our own rage against our own life starts to calm down.

When Nothing Else seems to work..and We  are surrounded by darkness of Failures...We feel Lost..We feel failed.It really gives a sigh of relief...Like Feeling Freah air...Like feeling Rain..Like feeling waves  at a  Quite beach ..This can go to the extent that  the only thing thankful for can be ,"Being still Alive"..It gives us hope to somehow continue. 

I may sound little sarcastic ,sad or depressed which I am...but this tiny feeling of Gratitude is helping me to  continue and It is a fact ...at least for me.. 

Dear Readers ,try being thankful for tiniest things in your life that you really feel thankful for..and then just for a minute think of people that Even don't  have that..Suddenly things will start falling into place..You will start feeling hopeful that whatever mess is there in your life  that can be cleared..things will work out..It  is just a matter of time..

It  definitely makes us compassionate and fills us with empathy..It calms us and our disturbed mind because we start having the feeling that we also have  atleast something..

Some times we all are going to some phases in life where nothing much is in our hands..What else is our way out ..I myself used to get irritated, annoyed,sad and disappointed when nothing works out..Things get ugly..Be it in Relationships or in professional lives...But when We start looking  at a the thin yet bright silver lining around the dark cloud..

Dear Readers  ,I am not saying it is easy to see..But one thing that am sure is that It is there..But our disillusioned mind could not see it..or feel it..

It is definitely because of repeated failures at personal or professional fronts..but we  forget that Life Goes on..It doesn't not stop for us feeling sad about it..So why not look for things that make us feel alive and significant in some possible way..makes us feel happy..in what we really want to do and not we are forced to do... Such things exist in everyone's life .Some see it ,some don't..People who are able to identify the little little yet the most significant things in  life ,live life to the fullest and others just  kept complaining and simply  waited for life to just pass by..and expected miracles to happen..which never happen  and they  continue to live in their mindmade shells forever ..I have myself spent years in this mindmade shell of mine..And many of us still continue to do so..

Dear Readers, Please Don't waste your lives ,There is no age  or perfect timing for  making a fresh start...Just make a start ...

Things Everyone Wants to Hear..Emotional musings..

Emotional  Musings..💞💞🥰🥰

Namaste everyone, 

I want to convey a sense of warmth and comfort through my.. Emotional musings.

I Hope u like it and crave to hear this....🥰

 Life of an ordinary Housewife..

Namaste everyone ,

I am a housewife  for almost 14 years,I was a housewife out of choice initially because my family and kids were my only priority..The only thing I expected from life was prosperity,well being  and happiness of my family..I never expected anything else from life ..I  never had any personal goals or dreams...

With passing years,I never realised how much underconfident  I became in front of people outside my family..I started lacking any little little decision making capability.. I was turning dumb..It is not that I was not qualified enough (I am B.tech ,M.tech in Computer Science).The thing I lacked was I was least bothered about  my own self...

Being a stay at home Mom ,I started ignoring my looks  and my health as well..I was never very peculiar about how I looked ..Neither was I bothered to go with the trends as I was busy in the upbringing of my kids..The strange thing was I never felt anythimg wrong in this 100% dedication towards my family..My family also never noticed that how I totally ignored myself over all these years..May be they would have thought that I am the typical housewife types..As most of the people judge us as housewives.. Society is not  bothered if we carry on like this and keep on fulfilling our responsibilities...They donot have a slightest  clue or they donot care that how a person's individuality is lost in the whole process of running a family as a  housewife..

Love and care given by us 24/7 to our families is not done to get any thing in return, it is only done out of love and care...I am not at all saying that all housewives have troubled lives but one thing is sure that we are never prepared for anything (God forbid) bad in life..We lack decision making ,we donot know how to handle finances..We don't know how to handle the world..We only know about our house ,our kids and everything going on  inside the house nothing else beyond that because that has been our life  for so many years..We never bothered  to know about the outside world..Our house, kids and family is the only world known to us..

We never did any self improvement, grooming or any kind of personality development to face the real world...This is particularly the case with simple ,ordinary  housewives  like me..🤔😕🤔 

Dear readers, Total commitment towards our family is a thing to be appreciated and not a thing to regret for ....but keeping out a piece of life for  our own selves is the thing that should be added to our daily routines... Otherwise we ordinary housewives will definitely end up  as a lost,underconfident and insecure person...This 100% dependency on family both emotional amd financial is not at all a healthy option..It may appear to work in earlier times and also I should say in the initial years of married life but not all our life because when our kids grow up and we grow old, the whole scenario changes..Living a dependent  life is no longer  recommended in today's  world..

Dear readers, I want to motivate you today that ,Please start taking out at least little time for your ownselves on daily basis..It is not a thing to be avoided ..In today's world it's definitely  mandatory..Work on your skills,Work on your health..Stay healthy...Improve  your learning,Work on a hobby...Go for a walk...but Do spend some  time on yourselves for self grooming and development..😊😇

You can also  read my below  post to read about the feelings of housewives..

life-of-housewife.html

 Regressive thought process of Indian housewives?

Namaste everyone,

In India About 86% women who experienced violence never sought help, and 77% of the victims did not even mention the incident(s) to anyone..

During the first four phases of the COVID-19-related lockdown, Indian women filed more domestic violence complaints than recorded in a similar period in the last 10 years.(source, The hindu)

 Don't know what is wrongwith with  our own society and people around us...People usually  take for granted others  without whom they can not even survive... They usually  undermine the importance of people who are actually  the backbone of their lives...Although these people work for us in the back end  but we fail to recognize their importance because they are willingly available 24/7..These are our greatest Indian housewives..(I am using the word Indian here  because am not aware of any other cultures or people other than my own  country)..

I am myself a housewife  for about 14 years....I agree to this very fact that housewives tend to tolerate things  that in normal cases nobody will tolerate.. and continue the relationship  tolerating verbal and in some cases even physical abuse.The following list might summarize it:

1.First and most important reason of tolerating abuse is their  kids..They donot  want to  give their children  a disturbed childhood..

2.The  fear of society is so much in them , they continue to tolerate  abuse in the closed doors of their homes. 

3.The fear of hurting their parents and further future of their siblings stops them from taking a progressive step.

4.They are not financially independent, so they find it difficult or rather impossible to leave their abusive husband or family.

5.They are  not confident and qualified enough to make a living for themselves and their kids..

6.In some cases housewives  even are willing to forgive infidelity done by their male partners ,just for the sake of  continuing and obviously for the fear and shame of society..Most importantly it is done for their children..

The above thought process exists there is no doubt in it..It is definitely regressive...I always thought of running a help center for such women  so that I can somehow help them to come out of this very situation..But unfortunately  neither I am in some Goverment position nor have enough money to run such an organization...That is a different  matter..but my point here is when we housewives will gather enough courage to stop any kind of abuse against  us..For how long women will keep on giving excuses  of being incompetent, weak,insecure and not being financially independent  as the reasons to tolerate any kind of abuse be it verbal or physical🤔🤔

Dear readers, especially housewives  ,Please donot have a regressive mindset..Today you might feel insecure , incapable and incompetent to face the world but that noway gives others the right to abuse you  in any possible way..Raise your voice..You will get the solutions once you start looking for it..Donot compromise your pride and self respect for ruthless abusers..Start living for yourselves..Give yourself  a chance..Things will work out..First free yourself if you find the situation is no way tolerable..Your kids and family will also eventually  understand . It is noway justified to tolerate  inhumane things..Sought help..Raise your voice..😇😇🙏🙏

Life of a housewife..

Life of a housewife..

Namaste everyone,
I am writing  this post to share some daily stories in the life of a housewife...I think I am little qualified writing this as I am myself a housewife for the past 14 years..
The word "House wife" is quite   underrated.. because we housewives  do work 24/7 ..no one can deny that..
 To be a Housewife for life, this decision is some times forced by circumstances,  sometimes it's a personal choice or sometimes we are not qualified enough  to do something else..😕😕
In the first case,some women are forced to leave their jobs to become housewives ,due to numerous  personal reasons like their husband or in laws  doesnot  like them working or some family situation becomes such like transfer of husband to some new place..bla bla..bla..itne sare reasons sunte hain apne friends aur family se.. the thing is you have chosen to  become a house wife.
Second case  can be because of your own children ,you choose to become a housewife for their upbringing ,in this case also sometimes women are forced to leave their jobs because they have none to take care of their children ..children as for everybody are our utmost priority..
 Reasons of becoming a housewife are numerous  but the thing is everybody  as a housewife today or some day starts feeling fed up of the monotony  of work all housewives have to go through  each day.. there is definitely  no change..
This feeling becomes worse if unfortunately  the women were forced to leave their jobs and  were quite qualified..
And for women who are  not that qualified  I personally think  situation is even worse as they find no way to go or even start..am not saying it's easy for the qualified ones but they somehow have some confidence  that they can start based on their qualifications.. but simple ordinary ones find themselves  in darkness..
Even if it  was a personal choice..
Reason kuch bhi ho when this feeling  sucks in ,we feel frustrated ,dissatisfied and disappointed..and think yeh kya kar liya hai humne apni life ke sath....kya ban gaye hain hum...
The thing here is jo life ke saal humne waste kar diye(yeh  waste  word use karna shayad galat hoga because  we invested all those years for our  own family and kids), we have to some how restart .. again...
The most important thing here is that it's not being a house wife is a problem  but the the problem surely   is being only a housewife with no other thing , qualifications,hobby,likes or dislikes to associate  with our personalities..
Over all these years we forgot  about ourselves  completely..but now we have to make a new beginning. Lets  start a new journey  together...
The thing is where to start,you can see my confidence building method that worked for me in the following link 👇

https://myheartfultalks.blogspot.com/2020/06/confidence-building-way-that-worked-for.html
One more most important point that we forget over these years is we completely lose our financial  independence.see my post below on my take on financial  dependence
https://myheartfultalks.blogspot.com/2020/05/financial-dependence.html

Dealing with Financial dependence on others.

Importance of financial independence in life.

Namaste everyone,
Over all those years of our pretty ordinary lives  we did not do anything for self development or anything more or less related to ourselves that was focused on us for our personal ,professional  and for that matter spiritual  growth..
"Hamara focus hamare upar kabhi nahi tha...bus family, family  and family ..we never knew or tried to know anything beyond that.. our lives appear complete...but never were..initially we donot realise.. but slowly gradually we come to know....ki kya kar liya humne apne sath.. kya ban gaye hain hum, emotionally to family pe dependency  hoti hi hai.. there is  nothing wrong in it.. family is our strength and support.. but jab  it comes to financial terms..not initially  but with  passing years.. we realise that humare paas apna earn kiya toh kuch bhi nahi hai.. over all those years apni sari energies family par laga di..but when it comes to our own bank balance .. we are a big zero.. "
Aisa nahi hai ki humein koi necessities  ke liye financial  crunch ho gaya hai or something like that.. but hum ordinary se logon ne khud apni financial and emotional freedom ko totally khatam kar diya...aisa maan liya ki  financial freedom is not important.. hum ordinary se ,simple se logon ki aisi thinking hoti hai ki ," we are for our family  and  family mei sabki apni apni responsibility  hai.. jismei maine ghar sambhlne ki responsibility  badi khush khush li hai... jo kafi hadh tak sahi bhi hota..hai"  lekin iske liy apni financial freedom ko compromise karna sahi nahi hai.. financial  freedom ka nahi hona is also a very important  reason of our  low self esteem and of course  low confidence.. humein yeh nahi bhoolna chahiye ki financial  support is also important  and is definitely a way  for supporting our family.... Har  choti choti cheez buy karne ke liye asking others.. is uncomfortable  and most of the time insulting.. it some times leads to different  kinds of depression, feelings of no self worth.. and although  what we do for our families  is priceless.. and nobody else can do it the way we do it.. but still losing financial independence is not a good healthy choice.. in initial years of our lives  we take each others financial burdens happily.. without complaints.. but once the other person  kabhi gusse mei makes us realise of  our expenses.. it is quite insulting..
I am not telling ki  everybody is going to have bad experiences..but chances are quite high.. toh why not work for it.. start something.. today .. now is the time.. how much little you will earn, it will give a whole  lot of confidence  and happiness...😊😊😊👍
You can also further read the below post that describes  what I have felt  as a consequence of financial  dependence..
https://myheartfultalks.blogspot.com/2020/06/consequeces-of-financial-dependence.html

Family First...is my way of life😊😊

Family first..

Namaste everyone,
For we the simple ordinary people " FAMILY FIRST " is not just a thought... hum ise mante bhi hain aur is fact ke sath jeete bhi hain..hamari poori life hamari family par hi focused hoti hai... I am a complete family person.. aisa karke hum koi ehsaan nahi karte..we do it because we love them... more than our own selves...hamara sab kuch sirf hamari family ke liye hi hota hai...
Everyday from morning to night we live for them..but ek stage ke badh aisa lagta hai yeh hamara "all time available"  wala attitude shayad hamari khud ki family  ka humein for granted lene ka reason  ban jata hai...hum unke bina   kuch nai hain.. yeh baat sach bhi hai.. aisa main dilse manti hun...but problem tab aane lagti hai jab hum apne liye ,apni self growth,apni health,apni hobbies ya apne interests ke liye kuch bhi nahi karte... aisa karte karte hum life ke maximum saal nikal dete hain.. and kabhi realise hi nahi karte  ki we  have actually lost ourselves in the journey..
Life itni monotonous ho jati hai.. humein bhi pata nahi chal pata.. what the hell is wrong???The wrong thing is that ki over all these years we never ever thought of ourselves,our self growth... looking inwards..working on something that we really feel contented and happy about. nothing nothing absolutely nothing..
Without family  personal or professional achievements are also of no use...but stopping to work on ourselves is such a blunder that we commit to our selves... inner engineering is very very vital to this.. so we should start it now itself... despite of whatever age groups we belong to.. it is not only important but inevitable..as far as I think about today's social structure and lifestyle.
Start today by doing little little things ,start by taking baby steps.. but do it..😊😊😊👍👍