My life,without me

Namaste everyone, 

"Seems strange and annoying  but is a truth that we ordinary people live a life that is purposeless but more importantly we live a life that has nothing to do with us or our aspirations..."

"Am I  living a life, without me?"Looking for answers of strange questions like this disappoints us but usually we are not able to find a way out..

Strange but absolutely true,this has been our only way of life..Nothing bothered us initially..Living a life that has nothing to do with ourselves will sooner or later result in big void in our own lifes.. Think about it..🤔

Sometimes we get natural realisations and many times we get forced realisations by others that keep on reminding us of our purposeless ordinary life..

"When it is self realisation it is not as painful and insulting as it is when people undermine us,insult us or abuse us or fail to recognize our contributions because usually people value and respect monetary contributions  by others in their lives.."

Dear readers,"Time will fly away ,years will pass..Start valuing yourself... Nobody else can do it for you....Following a dream, doing what you really love to do and feeling happy doing it,is no way acting selfish.."

We just have to  start making efforts on self grooming and development..We have to move with the time, we never improved or worked on ourselves for years altogether,we are still with our qualifications and skills that we acquired years back..So it clearly indicates we are incompetent and incompatible according to today's world..but if we have decided to restart and we are serious about our dream and our dream is important to us , instead of judging ourselves harshly we should start working on own ourselves...

Working on ourselves  requires a lot of effort and determination.. In addition to this we have to get ready for the harsh judgements of the world and fears of failure...Because we have been inactive professionally and have been living a pretty ordinary and simple life without any aspirations or dreams..We never thought we are capable  enough..This thought was the only major hurdle in the way of our own dreams as per my experience and thought...

Strong Determination is the only  thing that can drive us  to our goal..Commitment and  a desire to prove ourselves to our own expectations and then to the world can imbibe immense energy and motivation in us...😇😇👍👍.

You can  read my below post as well for the importance of having a dream in life.My Dream is Important To me.

Alone as always....

Namaste everyone,
I know something wrong is definitely  going on in our heads..when we start having this feeling that we are "Alone as Always..."
Life is full of failures and disappointments for weak and underconfident  people..It's a truth and I have felt it...but some how we continue...but actually we are not achieving anything ,not even reaching anywhere.. It appears as if we are simply wasting time and our own precious life doing nothing. We are just passing time by wasting it..
Sometimes this stagnant life of ours makes us  feel like a unfit for the world..We start feeling lonely...
Alone as always ,becomes our life mantra..These saddening thoughts keep on coming and we keep on demeaning our ownselves unless and untill we take real charge  of our lives...
Dear readers, life is not meant to be wasted, living a purposeless, meaningless life..I have been through  this feeling  of lacking the real purpose  in life for years...For simple ordinary people like me it is  not something  uncommon...
It's  not that we are suffering  or any thing like that..but a weird feeling that bothers us is  that ,What is our own worth ?What are  we good at?What have we really earned in life? What is the purpose of our life?

Answers to all the above questions  is nothing... absolutely nothing..😕😕
I know it is not easy to accept a pretty much failed life and getting along with it, is not easy.. sometimes we spend years without realizing  it like dumbs,  but once this feeling of unworthiness crops up in our minds, it really makes us very helpless and restless..
But instead to slipping into these depressing thoughts we have to somehow get over it..We have to start doing something fruitful.. something that  makes us happy,contented and little more confident about ourselves..
Working on ourselves ,working on our interests, and enhancing them is the only way out..It will definitely  not happen suddenly but if we will not start, it will never happen for sure..It's  difficult, very difficult..I admit it but not impossible...On our way we feel Alone as always...but slowly  and gradually with some simplest yet brightest feelings of accomplishments  will fulfill all the emptiness... within us..with continuous hard work and not loosing hope on ourselves...
Forget about the world it was us who were really responsible for our  own downfall,we ourselves left our own aspirations, desires and dreams far behind in life...
It is also true that we all are alone in our struggles...but we have to gather courage not for anybody else butfor  our own selves...😇😇
I personally  feel restarting after many years and living a simple purposeless life makes us so very underconfident  that we feel so hesitant to share our own thoughts ,feelings  and aspirations   with anybody else..Fear of failure and again going back to our stagnant,   monotonous and purposeless life scares us..because  believe me restarting was very difficult  for a ordinary  person like me... and we are no way mentally ready to face  failures again... at this point I  may not have achieved  anything,but hope is still alive..and I am putting  efforts..Hoping that my readers will relate to this.💞

Handling rejections in Life...

Handling  rejections in Life...
Namaste  everyone,
We all are living a social life,with people around us..so many things  are happening  around us on daily basis with each passing  moment.... 

Multiple thoughts are in our heads going on simultaneously....
Some things work out for us ,some don't..Some people like us ,some don't..We like some..and dislike some others..We want something but get something  else mostly..We love very few and very very  few love us..We are really important  to very few..and similarly  for us also very few are actually  important....We expect something ,get something  unexpected..With happiness  ,sorrows, failures and very little success , life goes on  and on. Days pass ,months pass and so does years...

One very important  realization  that I had as a result of my own purposeless ordinary and non aspirational  life is with all the chaos going on in life ,we all some how continue..but.. but..but..the thing that really derails our spirit  to live a normal life  are rejections...
Rejections,be it in our love life ,in our professional life ,be it in academics..be it in any thing...that matters  for us...it is  really hard to absorb...
Nobody likes to be rejected...It feels as such an insult that it totally shatters our self esteem  and confidence...We feel unworthy...disspointed..lost...It definitely  hits hard...It shatters our own belief  that, We can also achieve  something..We can also dream..Dreams do come true...
Mostly when we get rejected we donot want to face the world..Mostly with ordinary  people handling rejection is definitely  a total disaster..All our fears appear to come true...All our fears that stopped us all our lives from doing what we really wanted to achieve, start appearing  to be absolutely true..Its not easy...
We tried hard..We expected something for ourselves..We expected to fulfill our dream for the first time in life..We are ordinary people ...Facing rejection is not easy for us or anybody in this world...
I know it is very easy to preach that we have to start again ,we can not lose hope..we have to work much more harder..but "I am really falling short of words to explain  the worst feelings of getting rejected and that too multiple times..I am finding it damn difficult to get over it.."
Dear readers, Its not that rejections are not common, we all get rejected  in one thing or the other..and we all do carry on as well..but without anything substantial that we can relate to  or I should say without anything that belongs to us or is purely  our own achievement continue to follow  your dream is teally difficult..It is a ferocious mental struggle..that we ordinary  people continue to battle all our lives..😕😕 I know  these feelings of rejection are not easy to handle..Rejections  are demotivating to the extent that  they  have definitely  stopped many many deserving and talented people  from following  their dream..But we have chosen not to stop ,to carry on..I know it is becoming  more and more difficult  with each rejection that we get..but somehow we will gather all the shattered  pieces  of our dreams and continue  to follow our dream..which is important  to us..
You can read this post for the importance  of our dream in our lifes..my-dream-is-important-to-me.html

You can also go through  my below post about how long we should wait to get  success 👇👇how-long-we-should-wait-to-get-success.html

Quitting  is easy,hanging on is extremely  difficult..

Namaste everyone,
 We all have been through  different  kind of struggles in life ,be it professional  or personal ..but if we somehow gather  the courage to hang on ,these struggles  will definitely  fade away one day..but if we decide to quit , those weak times which may have become the milestones of our life will be like any other day of our pretty ordinary  lives..
If we are able to gather little courage and belief  that we are not going to quit ,no matter what,sooner or later we can achieve  what we want..but if are not able to overcome our fears we will definitely  not reach any where...
I know it is not at all easy but is definitely  worth it...Struggling hard for your dreams is not easy but it really gives unimaginable sense of satisfaction  and self worth..when we achieve  things we always dreamt for..
When we decide to quit because  we fear failure or we can not work hard enough or due to any other excuse or reasoning we give to ourselves,our dreams can never become a reality,this is for sure..
When we decide to quit because we decide to  enslave  ourselves  to our weaknesses and whatever circumstances...but most importantly  we forget,   
"What are we doing to our lives,to our dreams and to our own expectations  from life ,forget about the expectations  our loved ones have from us..?"
Obviously choosing  the path of quitting  was easier, we were definitely  weak and
underconfident..or I  should say  our own dream  was not important  enough for us to hang on...
Everybody  knows the struggles  are real,nothing is easy..with each passing moment  we have go through  various kinds of tests that life throws at us..but we decide  to choose  a stagnant life and instead of making a come back we  decide to quit..
Many or I should say mostly ordinary people wasted their lives because at some moment  of their struggle  towards their goal they decided to quit..
 Dear readers,

• Why we  have become so ignorant  towards our own expectations  from life?
• Why we decide not to follow our own dreams?
• Why we decide to be ordinary and average all our lives instead of trying again?
• Why we ourselves  are our least priority?
• Why are we Ok..with losing and quitting?
• Why can't  we express what we really feel?
• Why can't  we say 'No' to any body?
• Why can't we stop pretending to be happy?
• Why can't we live for ourselves  ?
• Why can't we continue  despite  of all odds?
• Why we have to quit all the time?
• Why can't we make a new start even after multiple failures?
• Why can't we also make it?

Ignoring all these questions we actually  make our own lives such a mess that it becomes impossible or we can say appears that we can not come out of this web of unworthiness and lack of purpose.
It may appear easy to quit in the beginning  and hanging on difficult..but the truth of life is living a failed life,  living a purposeless is far more difficult..It is definitely  filled with dissatisfaction, dissent and disappointments.
I have felt it and so as so many ordinary people like me..Please donot continue  to live like this..Give life another  chance ,give yourself another chance..Life is not meant to be wasted in regrets but we have to make a come back with far more energy and the best ever version of ourselves..😊😊

Go through the following  post to know the importance  of dream in our ordinary lives.

My Dream is Important to Me..

Coming out of a Failed Relationship."I Hate You and I Mean it.."

" I hate you and I mean it.."

Namaste everyone,

Getting  a failed  relationship out of your life and especially mind is not at all easy for people who were actually into the relationship with full commitment and honesty..They find it the hardest to accept that the relationship is over or does not have any significance for the other and therefore needs to be ended..

Giving your 100% in a relationship  is not at all wrong but in addition , expecting honesty and commitment is noway a crime or asking way too much..

"Relationship is a living thing that feeds on love ,care,trust, honesty,commitment and respect..In absence of any one of the above requirements it will sooner or later die..."

Once admitting that the relationship is over physically  it still takes a lot of time to get over it emotionally...

 Reminding ourselves how  badly the other person hurt you ,that too multiple times  and over quite a long period of time..only because we became so ignorant  or I should say we refused to see the reality in the name of our love and importance of the relationship for us..but now that we know that there is nothing left in the relationship we must keep reminding yourself loud and clear that you simply cannot stand your partner who failed to  continue a pure relationship due to whatever reasons and tell him or her ,"I hate  you and I mean it"..

"From now onwards I can not allow you to take over my feelings and  throwing  me in the depression of unworthiness and insecurity.. Whatever excuses you gave and how badly you played with my emotions can never be justified by any dumb explanation..So so..so...I hate you and I mean it.."

Dear readers, coming out of a failed relationship is not a failure of life..It is actually a blessing in disguise that protected us from any further damage both emotionally and sometimes physically as well..Don't be emotional fools..As I say being  emotional is not a problem  but being a emotional fool is definitely a problem..We ordinary people are emotional and tend to act foolish many a times acting emotionally..Coming out of a failed and broken relationship is not easy..But keep reminding yourself  how badly the other person used you, hurt you, insulted you and made you feel insecure,  underconfident and unwanted..

With passing days ,you will surely feel thankful ,Yes ,you read me correct ,thankful to the hurts done to you so that you became stronger and more confident as a person..There are no insecurities now..There is no sense of unworthiness as you were forced to feel as a result of the relationship that lacked integrity ,honesty and of course purity..Give a thought...🤔🤔

Dear Diary, I am Tired of failing...

Namaste  everyone,

This post was written by me in my diary when I was really tired of failing again and again despite trying the hardest and giving my best..hope you relate with it.

Many people like me who have lived and still continue to live ordinary lives..are really sick and tired of failing all the time..We never get expected results...not at par ever with our own expectations...we fail ourselves many a times or rather most of the times....
This pretty good track record of failing makes us deep down so... so underconfident and really sad...continuing becomes real difficult..The feelings of  unworthiness  are really empowering us..
What next...What is way out of this..?? Are we going to be like this all our lives...??All kind of negative thoughts  are hitting us real hard...We donot know whom to approach  for help..We are not at all vocal to others about the thoughts in  our head and feelings  in our hearts..

We never expressed that the little little things that we failed to achieve  were  very very important  to us...They were our little dreams..they were what we always wanted to be..
We wanted to be ,The real independent ones both emotionally  and financially..We proved to be failures all the times.. with no answers  or justifications at all..What are we really doing wrong ? What makes us fit for nothing ?Are we really unworthy?Why are we only destined for all this?
The repercussions  of failures are deep routed..they are definitely  making us very weak deep inside...they make our lives miserable and results in full financial  and emotional dependence  on others..that is not at all a healthy  choice for any individual..We are getting totally off track..Losing all the time is not easy..
Sense of some kind of accomplishment makes a individual  feel worthy of living..It makes  them feel happy and joyful..It definitely  gives them purpose  for life..A deep sense of feeling important and successful in our own eyes and also  for others is very much inspiring  for a individual  to carry on in life.. The sole purpose  of being successful  in achieving  our dreams is to make our ownselves and our loved ones real  proud..But failing all the time is really hitting hard...and most importantly gathering courage over and over again to start afresh is very easy to say but extremely  difficult  to accomplish...😕😕😕😕😕

How to Deal With Our Own Weaknesses..?

Dealing  with our own  weaknesses..

Namaste everyone,

Our life  can easily be summarized as a result of  how we conquered  our own weaknesses...

Ordinary people are usually not able to control their emotions that further turns into their weakness...
Being emotional is not a problem but being a emotional fool is a real problem..Having empathy for others,loving them,caring for them ,doing them favours..is not at all bad ..but things become out of control when we allow people to  use us for their own selfish motives that too at the stake of harming us in some possible way. In the way of using ordinary people some  selfish  ones not only hurt  them emotionally  but can also cause financial  damage..
Usually  we are attached to people  whom we love,be it family or friends..we have emotional connections  with them ..we are of course  emotionally  dependent  on them as well...but always remember  there is a very thin line between being used and helping someone.
We can not be simply blind in love or due to whatever emotional  reason.. and  allow others to use us to the extent they start  hurting us mentally..
"Emotions are for something that we really feel from the heart..they are heartful..there is no space of selfishness  in relationships  that are based on love and trust.."
Being  an emotional human being  is not the trait of a weak person..but when we allow people to use us for their selfish  motives and we continue  to allow them without any regret ,this is not our weakness but  shear foolishness..
Favours  are done amongst people out of love and friendship..
Having a empathy  or rather a soft corner for people is not a weakness but misusing other people's emotions is of  course  an offence..
We have to deal with it with self confidence..we allow people to misuse us or ill treat us or disrespect  us or reject us only because we easily revealed  to them that we are weak deep within and will not be able to do without them..This show off of our weakness allows people to treat us the way they want depending upon their needs or even moods..
   One very very important  point to be noted here is what are  reasons for ordinary  people being so emotionally weak, foolish , underconfident and insecure that some people are easily able to use  them and throw  them as per their  discretion..
The thing is they used us for whatever  selfish  reasons  of their's, still we were useful to them  in some possible way..we never used them,we simply  loved them and did favours out of a relationship that we  shared with them..Now if and only if we  decide to confidently  deal with our weaknesses...the other  selfish  person is and was never of any use to us..So quiting becomes the easiest, think about it..🤔🤔🤔

Why Everybody Is Faking Around?

Everybody is faking around….

Namaste everyone, 

What is happening all around us in terms of emotional turbulences is so detrimental that we all on day to day basis appear dissatisfied , disappointed and sometimes saddened as well..

Nobody appears  happy...Everybody  looks fed up, tired and lost in some sense..Everybody is so... so.. fed up but nobody wants to work on the solution..

"Everybody  is faking around...hiding their fears,  insecurities,disappointments, aspirations,weaknesses and many a times sadness...They pretend to be happy... Everybody is OK...but from  inside all are torn out.."

We all are stuck in the web of expectations ,some from others and some from our ownselves..When these expectations are somehow not met.. life and people around us stop making sense...

Dear readers,to move forward in life we have to stop pretending or faking ...We just have to first accept our own personality as we are, with no manipulations...We have to identify our own weaknesses and strengths.....We can not just fool around our inner own self..Because pretending something that we are actually  not can never take us anywhere we really want to reach....It may help to exist in society for some time..But with time everybody's true self  appears ...So why can't we always be what we really are..and Express what we really feel..So that relationships made and commitments done in every aspect  of life are based on purity and truth...thus are longlasting....

Dear readers,What others think of us should  no way bother us ,if we are  not insecure from within and our intentions are pure...Stop being the victim of your own assumptions about ourself from other's perspective...It does not matter at all...If you are true to yourself..

Try following things..

1.Be vocal about your feelings. 

2.Donot offend or abuse anybody in the name of proving your point..

3.Accept your weaknesses...first. 

4.Donot get affected by other people's comments or point of views about you..Be it positive or negative..

5.Donot seek approvals  for everything you do..

6.Own your actions..

7.Work hard on improving yourself and not on simply proving your point to others..

8.Do things that you yourself like or love to do and not to please others.

9.Donot forget to complete your responsibilities in the name of following your dream..

10.Donot lose hope if you get failures or harsh judgements from others .

11.Donot demean yourselves nor others by your actions or words..

12.Stop 

12.Be committed to yourself and your dream..

13.Donot be led by others point of view but you can take guidance..There is no harm in seeking help..But 100% dependence on others for everything is not acceptable..

14.Stop pretending..

15.Accept life as it is, donot jump to conclusions based on your fears and insecurities..

16.Always move forward,stop living in the past and judging yourself  on the basis of your past..

17.Help others in whatever possible way you can..

18.Distance yourselves  from all negativity be it about yourself or even other people.

19.Keep on improving your skill set..

20.Work  on self grooming and  self improvement..

Nothing is impossible, take the first step..Your pure commitment and hard work will guide you further..😇👍

 

Why I am Still Unchanged ?

Unchanged me...

 Namaste everyone,

Thank God ,time did not change me..The only thing that was left unchanged with time was me.Life's ups and downs never changed me in the sense that ....

1.I never stopped trusting people...

2.I never stopped Giving my best to them...

3.I always kept Choosing other's priorities over mine..

4.I Never betrayed anyone..

5.Always I was ready for help..

6.Doing favours and not asking anything in return was my way....

7.I Never expressed myself. I never let people know how I really felt...

8.Always available attitude of mine..

9.I have  never been  disrespectful to anyone..

10. I was always been  the simple,ordinary me that always wished good for everyone..Always prayed that I donot want to hurt anyone intentionally or even unintentionally...

11.Always adjusting  even if required sacrificing my own interest..

12.Never asked for favours from anybody nor even expressed my desires..

13.Nil expectations from others..The only thing expected was respect and honesty...

14.Never had a dream for myself..

15.Never raised my voice against anybody..

My personality traits donot seem to fit in today's so called successful world..Some people might see this as a flaw in my personality and that I was foolish,naive and underconfident  but for  me these above things mentioned were my strengths but irony is my strengths could never made me successful more importantly I never changed with time..

I personally never agree nor I give  any attention to other's thought process and perception about me ,It is my nature..I donot want to change...but One thing  that I totally lacked and regret is that ,"I never had a dream of my own,I was always OK being average,I never recognized or realized that I was living a purposeless life and was not at all motivated to achieve anything in life...This was indeed the biggest blunder I did to myself..."

Change is difficult but it is definitely inevitable ...

Changing for good , mending your ways ,improving  and learning with each passing day adapting to new environment is not easy for ordinary people but it is the thing we should definitely opt for..This is the need..As lately I also recognized our older ,ordinary and simpler versions donot fit in today's world.. 

The world where people value each other,give 100% to each other only out of love... Honesty ,integrity and commitment were the things people looked for in each other no more exist..It's not that every body is bad but selfishness has definitely taken over selflessness.. Priorities have changed..

After so many personal and professional  failures ,still ordinary people like me find it difficult to change..

Dear readers,I am never in favour of changing your personality  for the sake of fitting into the world but becoming strong and confident enough to face the world is inevitable...In absence of self confidence and atleast the courage to stand on your own be it professionally or personally you will continue to live a miserable and purposeless life..And this is a fact ...

The only way that may work for ordinary  people like me is to 

1.Work harder and harder  without losing hope

2. Focus on Self improvement and grooming in terms of improving our skill set.

3.Maintaining a positive mindset and hanging on, no matter what.. is the only way out..

As I personally feel we can not change inside out..We can improve and learn but we can not change our basic  nature....So ,Dear readers, Please donot change for the sake of others or for fitting in...but do improve and work upon your strengths...😇👍