Walking alone..in the dark but towards light...

Walking alone..in the dark but towards light...

Namaste everyone,
Dear diary,
You know me,How unworthy I was feeling ,How alone I was,How underconfident  and insecure I have been all my life..How afraid I have always been ,How introvert I have always been,How ordinary and average  I have always been...
But one fine day that was not so fine , I started feeling how I was wasting my life on account of my own insecurities...I never had others to blame for my failed life...I always took responsibility for my life..but never valued neither my life nor my aspirations  for myself  from me..I was not that person who expected a lot from others around me..but obviously I had some atleast some expectations... Actually I used to feel annoyed and disappointed when people failed  to meet my little little expectations  from them..like all of us.
I had realised  I always failed myself..I was  never capable of meeting  my  own expectations  from myself and was never even bothered a bit..Waiting for something to click or something  magical to happen or some of the people around  me will realise what I really need..and I will get a breakthrough  in life..because although  I am pretty ordinary  and simple I always had a dream that I  even hid from myself and kept it deep within my heart for years altogether but never did anything about it..These were my stupidest  feelings ever..I never had the courage  to do something for
myself..Following my dream was next to impossible  for such a pessimistic  person like me...
But now that I  have  gathered  some confidence  to follow my dream that really makes me happy and gives me a purpose ..I feel sense of accomplishment ,I have something of my own now..I am far more relaxed  and satisfied  in life..I was never like this before...
But dear diary,I have still not gathered enough confidence  to let people know that I have started a new journey..I am still skeptical  about the outcomes  of my efforts ...I am still afraid..but somehow I have decided  not to stop and walk alone..
Walking alone has it's own pros and cons...
Pros :Walking alone you are not answerable to any body ,You have no fear of judgements..You are your own boss..You are what you really are ,You need not pretend  anything..You have all the freedom to think,feel and express the way you personally  feel ..You are  yourself  your biggest  critic ,You are not  afraid of failing  or committing  any mistakes..
You feel independent, You feel strong..You are no more insecure...because  you have no one else..
Cons:You are sometimes  really afraid,You need somebody to validate  your work..You need suggestions ,You definitely  need emotional and moral support..You need somebody  to lift you up when you fall..You need somebody  to pacify  you when you cry..You always need somebody  to say that
1."I am with you,Everything  will be Ok"..
2."I will be with you no matter what"
3."I love you..my love is not defined by your success  or failure  in life".
I always keep juggling  these thoughts  in my mind but I can no way stop..
Dear readers, If you relate with me in slightest  possible way ,Please decide to restart and follow  your dream..😊😊😊

No talent...at all..Its really not true..

Are we talentless.??

Namaste everyone..

When we start analyzing  our own selves for making a new beginning after years of inactivity professionally ,  we judge ourselves ,we try to know, What are we good at? What hidden talent we have?...and we start comparing  ourselves to people around us ,and sometimes  with whole lot of successful  people  around the world .. and within seconds we conclude that.. "Arre yaar ...we donot have any talent..hamare pass  koi talent nai hai.. Karen toh kya Karen.. kahan se start  Karen???"
It is only because we have never achieved  anything.. kabhi kisi cheez mei first nai aaye na.. kabhi koi prize bhi nai jeeta.. bus hum ordinary se average se log hain..but yeh sab hamare mind ke selfmade judgements hain ..hamare khud ke bare mei...
I can assure you ki ..these are not true at all..I am telling u all this..so called Gyan  because I also realised and felt this deeply after  around ten years... Please donot believe  these self demeaning  thoughts of your own for yourselves..  These are not true at all.. Main reason behind that I can say  with confidence  is that,
"We never ever really tried.. humne kabhi  kuch karne ki koshish nahi ki.. kabhi itna self confidence  hi nahi la paye..ki hum bhi kuch kar sakte hain.. kabhi kisi cheez ko achieve  karne ke liye motivated feel hi nai kiya..kabhi fail hone par dobara try karne ke bare mei nahi socha..bus isi notion ke sath jeete rahe hi we are  good for nothing fellows.. lekin now we have to start.. kuch naya kuch fresh..kuch real happiness dene wala..  kuch bhi ,kitna bhi chota kyun na lage  but we ordinary people will definitely  make a start....😊😊
We have some how shout out loud that 👇👇
1.Yes, restarting even after years is definitely  possible.
2.Yes,we are also capable.
3.Yes, restarting is also possible  even after multiple  failures.
4.Yes, we are also worthy.
5.Yes, it is not going to be easy.
6.Yes, we are not afraid of any judgements.
7.Yes ,we are willing to learn and improve. 
8.Yes, we will not stop.
9.Yes, our dream is important  to us.
10.Yes ,we will make ourselves  and our loved ones real proud one day.
11.Yes, our dream is definitely achievable..
Dear readers, just give yourselves some time ,give yourself the courage and confidence  to restart and follow your dream..and always keep on  learning and improving and one more thing, Please donot be affected by negative  judgments of people ,rather use them to further improve..

The feeling of being loved ...🥰🥰

Love and life💞

Namaste  everyone ,
We all are beautifully amazed  or rather mesmerized by the beautiful feeling of being loved..We feel on the top of the world..This life all of a sudden starts to look beautiful . Our failed lifes suddenly  start appearing  worthy ,we ourselves  start feeling worthy , loved and important..Feelings  of positivity and hope start pouring into us..We feel as if everything is achievable..we feel loved and as a result we are definitely  filled with so much energy to do whatever it takes to make our partner happy. We feel totally dependent  on our partner..we actually  become  very vulnerable  to  small small things..All good things come with some side effects..
The feeling of being  truly loved gives us the immense  desire to live and love life ,but in addition to that it makes us  emotionally very weak so that any smallest negative thing disappoints  us to the core..
The dependence  on love for life is good and the feeling  it generates  within us is incredibly the best..but the thing is, Is it long lasting...??
Actually  when real life comes in play ,other  aspects of life like family , career ,health etc....start taking priority  and  it appears as if love has taken a back seat..and it happens only when the foundation  of love was  not strong enough.. There is no doubt that love is a pure feeling..but people sometimes  fail to create a balance between  love and real life..because  fantasies  of love can easily make anybody blind and can  distract  anybody from realities of life ,in which case the positivity  created by love in our life can not stay longer..
To fulfill our commitments in love we  need to do a lot sacrifices, most people only imagine love as an attraction  and nothing more than that..but they forget that love requires  commitment,trust and faith in the other partner ..and in our ownself  as well..
Love is a thing of heart , everything in love is filled with purity of emotions..If there is slightest  adulteration  of love with disrespect ,mistrust and expectations  of changing the other according to one's  own perspective..I strongly feel in today's  world these relationships  won't  survive for ever..
The LOVE is a gift of God ,everybody is not lucky enough to find a person  who reciprocates your feelings  of love truly back to you..Love is indeed precious..but we should  not forget that it has to be conducted on daily basis...Once you purpose  someone and he or she says a Yes and it's  done..it is definitely not like this..We have to nurture our love bond with time ,affection, care and trust on daily basis..
As it is the the most important  thing for people who are really in love so we can not be ignorant  about what our other partner thinks or really feels..We have be the support system of each other..because more there  will be love more will be emotional dependence on each other..more will be expectations  from each other...
Dear readers ,I must say here ,"Love is life ,give your loved ones the priority  they really deserve..and daily nurture  your loved relationships  with lots of care ,trust and support.Let your loved ones know that you will always be there for them  and that they are loved for ever"..because  Dear readers,  all materialistic things are  somehow sooner or later achievable but not true love..🥰💞.

Believe in yourself,Failures do not define us..

Believe in yourself

Namaste everyone,
Failures  do not define us..This is absolutely true..but we are definitely  not courageous enough to make this our reality..We have been ordinary  underconfident ,emotionally weak and fragile individuals who never believed  in ourselves and nor our own dreams..
All our lives we have been defining ourselves  on the basis of our failures and for this I must thank our pretty bad track record as far as success in life is concerned ,be it emotionally  or even professionally..  We were never surprised  by knowing that people around  us also share our mindset and  define us by our failures..We ushould not get annoyed about all this because we ourselves used to think that we are not good for any thing..
All our lives we  believed that any kind of success  or satisfaction  of accomplishment  is not meant for us..It was us only who chose to be average and never even dared to dream or rather follow what we really liked or loved to do..All our lives we pacified  ourselves  that success is unachievable  or rather impossible  for us...
We never thought  of first fighting our own mindset to follow our dream...This is also true that may be we have failed multiple  times ,but does that mean that we  are going to fail again...So we shouldn't  try any further..
Even after we ordinary ones somehow  gather courage to move a little forward , we find it very difficult to fight against the mindset of people around us..They find our dream silly ,unimportant  and total waste of time..Because we always presented  such a weak picture of our personality  in front of them. Because of our weaknesses  we allowed other people's  judgements  about us to work against us..But a real person who is really passionate about his or her dream shouldn't  be bothered about this..The thing that really matters in the way of following  a dream for any person in this world is the self belief  that he or she is strong enough  to achieve it and with each passing  day will work harder and harder towards it ..and finally will definitely  achieve  it..
Please stop making other people's  perspectives  your reality..They donot feel how you feel ,they might not know how you felt when you failed..they might not know how passionate  you are about your dream they might not know how important  your dream is for you..
The thing is they have been clearly defining   us on the basis of our failed past..But we are changed individuals now ..our dream is important  to us..and is definitely  not unachievable..We have decided  to take accountability  of our lives..We are responsible  for our dreams ,our dreams are definitely  our reality now.No negativity can stop us  not even the  one in our own minds..
This is also a fact for life that believing  in ourselves is the first step but further we have to keep  confronting for own weaknesses, be it emotional  or something  professional. We have to keep on  updating ourselves , learning new things  and working harder and harder with each passing day..
Dear readers,while writing this most I feel it from my heart ,I am also not a very professionally  succeesful person..I have just began my journey..and somehow strongly believe  that these things that I write are felt by all ordinary people  and thoughts  that I can in some possible  way relate with you all and  if I am able to motivate you in any slightest  possible way I will more then happy.. This is the real mission  of my writings..😇😇
So Just start believing  in yourself and your dream..continue to improve and work on your flaws..but please donot stop midway...otherwise we will prove all people  aroind us true about their  thinkings about us..This is the only way out to pursue what you really dream for..

Is love the only thing required for life??

Love and its importance in life.

Namaste  everyone,
This question  bothers me often that ,Is love the only thing required for life ??
Relationships that are only based on love..in real life may be able to survive for sometime and present a very good picture of life ahead..but  there are of course  many other aspects of life as well..which if ignored mostly result in failed relationships..
This is absolutely  true and everybody agrees with the fact without love there is no life . Any kind of human relationship can not even exist without love..but forgetting other aspects of a relationship like trust ,respect, care and of course finances  definitely  will lead us to a failed relationship.
Love is a real wierd feeling but nobody can live without it... I find it strange ,yet this is 100% true..We as humans want to be loved ,rather I should say it is not a want but a need like food ,clothing and shelter..
We all want to be loved especially  by people whom we love  a lot..Love makes us feel worthy and important. We feel secure ,we feel protected..we feel cared..this gives immense motivation to live...no matter what life throws  at us ..
Love is important,rather the most important driving force for simple ordinary people..because clearly we never had any personal achievements  or a successful  professional  life..all we have was love..nothing else..There is no doubt that we were loved by our family and loved ones..so that we were able to drag our rather purposeless  life  for all these years...love was the only strength  we had..love was  and is our  driving force...love protects us from a selfish world outside ,it protects us from being left alone in the crowd..it uplifts us when we are weak ,it gives us feeling of being wanted..because  we also love our family and loved ones as they love us...there is no doubt that love is everything..but is it good thing to keep on living  a dependent  and purposeless life only for love..Losing what we really are..or our identity for love is it worth it?
The answer is may be Yes for very rare individuals for initial periods..but as far as the reality check  of life is concerned  I feel  the answer is a No. Love is definitely  the foundation  of any relationship but  because of the absense of your own individuality and purpose  for life ,you won't  be able to survive  the ups and downs of life..because love does makes us  emotionally dependent  on others..to the extent that we start losing ourselves  and our identity  for the sake of love..and from there  Love the biggest gift of life starts to become problem..for which  ordinary people donot even have a solution..In course of time ordinary  people make themselves so so emotionally  weak and vulnerable that  they end up losing their  emotional  and sometimes  financial  independence  as well  only out of love..Then they can not see a way out  of God forbid..things do not go as expected in life.
Please ,dear readers donot lose your individuality  for love..we have to make ourselves rise in love but not fall..love has to be our strength  and not  a weakness..

Just start being you..That is what matters..

Namaste  everyone,
We have been telling ourselves from the past so many years  that we can not be successful  in anything we do,how small  it may be..we always used  to think that success  is not meant for ordinary average people like us...we are not worthy enough, we are not lucky enough..We never even had the urge to be successful ..It was mainly  because of our own thought processes..that were  filled with fears and insecurities.I  am sharing mine here👇👇
My thought process over all these years was like," I  couldn't  have a successful  career,but that does not matter much for me because I have closed all possible doors for myself with the strong mental belief that success is not meant  for me and  I will be like this all  my life..but will always support others ,be it  in any possible way I could..I was always very supportive  and positive for others around me..I was always ready to share my piece of cake with them..all the time..I always wanted people around me or anyone I may not be knowing much about to be successful, I had inner strong sense of positivity for everybody and was always happy for other people's  success  and achievements...but not for myself."
But this is quite strange and absolutely  true after wasting (I shouldn't  be using the word wasted) so many years ,very lately I realised ,I was definitely  very positive and supportive  for everybody but never for my ownself.. Deep within actually I was filled with negative emotions and sense of unworthiness. May be I was having the thought  process if I couldn't  succeed atleast help others  to be successful..I was actually a weak and under confident  person deep within..
Lately I realised how can a pretty unsuccessful  person  be eligible for motivating others ,I was telling people  things that I was never ready and courageous  enough to follow.
Definitely  I was faking myself..I was faking that success  is not important  to me..actually  because of the fear of failure  and public judgement ,I was never able to gather the courage  to follow my dream or to do what I  really feel like doing..I hid my own aspirations  from myself..I myself was my own biggest enemy..My fears were far bigger then my dream..I couldn't  overcome  my fears..but I was definitely  telling  others to do so..but never followed  them myself..
There was no need of me pretending  to be a different  person to myself and to the world.."I just had to be  me..that was it..But I could  not even gathered  the courage  to do so..I was my last priority.."
But not anymore..I am definitely  finding it damn difficult..but atleast I have started trying..I am still lacking confidence but I am trying..one funny thing I would like to say here  is  I am writing  my heart out in my blog www.myheartfultalks.blogspot.com 

But  I have not shared the links  to my own family or even told them about my blog as yet..From this you can imagine  how weak and under confident  I have been all my life..I am giving myself the time I need to make it successful ,I myself donot know how long this is going  to take..but one thing am sure I am improving with each passing day..That is important.. My self confidence and self belief  is dragging me towards my goal although very slowly  everyday..And that is what matters  for me..😊😊😊

The ray of hope...can work wonders...

The ray of hope can work wonders...

Namaste  everyone,
On our journey  towards our dream we confess that   despite being very motivated initially, we really start feeling low because there are no results at all..I know we are trying hard ..I also know we have become so passionate  about it that it drives us further to move forward..but lack of results demotivates us ..And it is true for all positive  persons as well..
"what we look far is a ray of hope..but while waiting for that moment  for something to click,we definitely feel frustrated and helpless in the absence of results but we  can not stop in between..while we look for a ray of hope from anything ,be it in the form of some appreciation or some kind and motivating  words from others especially  our loved ones can of course  do wonders..."
Unfortunately  most of us lack that ..so What should we do now?There is no one that backs our dream..two possibilities ,one is to stop and start living your purposeless life again or the second one to work further harder..The choice is yours..

But one thing I would like to add learning from my  experiences  towards my  dream is that ,"Please keep on motivating a weak, average person..Even if there was nobody for you ,but atleast you be there for somebody else". It may not be important  for you but for the person who is following  a dream its  important..It can drive them further no matter what..In the lack of results motivation and hope is the only key..
I have felt how hopelessness , discomfort and anxiety grips us when we fail again and again..I very well know and have felt as well that it is not easy...no way..
"Hope" that the day  for what we strive  for will definitely  come..At least with each passing  day we are moving forward  only..We have to train our mind to keep working  towards our goals.
The problem  with ordinary average people is  over the years they have never experienced  success  neither they worked hard enough  to achieve  it..Actually  fear of failure  was  so much imbibed  in us that it prevented  us to use our full potential  to follow what we really wanted or dreamt for..It is of course  a reality check , we have to except it.. 
Now after so many ifs and buts we somehow  gathered courage  after years to pursue something to live for,some purpose..even in the absence of any hope from outside circumstances  and people around  we just can never even think of stopping..Only road available  is the one that takes us towards our dreams..
To keep our hope lit and spirits high ,we have to look inwards.
 Ask yourselves the following  questions :

1. Why can not ordinary  people have a dream to follow? 
2. Why can't  they achieve  something independently?Why can not they have something  that they can call their own ?
3. Why can not they be worthy enough?  
4. Why can not they expect big from life ? 
5. Why can not they just stop being average  and part of the crowd ?
6. Why can't they just be real ? 
7. Why can not they just stop pretending to be happy?
8. Why can not they move forward for something that really satisfies  their soul and gives them a real sense of accomplishment ?
9. Why can not they start living rather than simply existing?
10. Why can not they  choose  to be really happy and joyful from within?

If answers to these kind of  questions  is a big YES, then there  is  still hope ..The ray of hope that can work wonders ,is the guiding force  deep within all of us .. we need not look ouside for that..We have to develop  a sense of self acceptance,confidence, self esteem  and trust that we can do it..Most importantly faith in "GOD" can also take us to where we really  want to be in life..😇😇

Why do we feel disheartened in the absense of expected results...??

Namaste everyone,
This post I have written to my diary ,my friend to whom I can easily discuss my weaknesses and fears..
Dear diary,
You know how much courage I gathered to start what I really wanted to achieve ,something that I own...small yet the most important for me,My dream...
You know me, how weak I have been..With the  lowest confidence ever and a lot of insecurities I  decided to start...but now that I am on my way, again I am feeling lows because of absence of any success indicators so far...I am afraid...I do not want to lose now..I just can not stop now, neither I want..It is my dream and you know it..
Why these fears are empowering me...I am losing confidence..The enthusiasm with which I started  and determination I had  are slowly fading... I am not seeing any results coming till date..
What next??You know very well that I never really achieved anything in life...and you also know that I have been  a average person who never even wished for achieving something for my own self..You know me , I have been an introvert all my life..pretending to be "Ok"...with what I was...
You very well know that how energetic and excited I  was with my new dream..My energy levels are lowering now .What if I again fail ??... "No" ,I do not want to fail...otherwise it will be the hardest to start all over again..I have been weak and insecure all my life..
You know how desperate I am to make myself proud , I equally wanted to make my kids proud..This  dream is my need not my want...
But I can not stop now , I  affirm that I will not stop now..no matter what... “God ,please guide my way...I need your guidance and support ...”
 One thing I am realising is dreams are never easy to achieve for anybody...but continuous  hard work ,patience and believe in yourself are the only driving forces and nothing else..
If your dream is as important as if it poses an existential threat to your existence then nobody will   ever stop or even think of quitting..😇😇😇.

Fulfillment of my own hopes and expectations from me..

Namaste everyone,
Like every other person  in this world we all have some expectations and hopes from ourselves...I am here not at all focusing  on expectations  from others..focus of this post is totally on expectations  and hopes from our own selves..
We are unsuccessful average  individuals who have not achieved  much in life that  is even worthy or  incredibly outstanding...we do have pretty  average  lives..we never achieved  much in life..every thing achieved was  average or sometimes  rather below average...
But is this not true that we always dreamt of a successful  life deep in our hearts..but obviously  we failed that too miserably to achieve  it...
We were never able to gather courage  to follow what we really loved to pursue or do..Dreams are definitely  easy to see but difficult  to achieve.. Dreams require courage,confidence and committment...
The thing is all people are not equipped  enough mentally  and physically ..nor are fully qualified to achieve them..I personally  feel, this is true..but knowing this what next??..Answer is simple..we have to work on it..we have to improve ourselves on daily basis, we have to learn  new things..we have to keep moving forward,we have to generate  sense of self confidence and the belief  that our dream is definitely  achievable and we will achieve  it...Results may not start coming the  very first day...we can not stop midway..we can not stop in the absence of expected results..we have to keep believing that we deserve  to win with our hard work and continuous efforts...
Fulfillment  of my own hopes and expectations  from me is the most important  for me,I will  not be anymore bothered  about what will the consequences of my efforts  or how long it will take  for me to taste a bit of success..I will keep on trying...
This thought  process is the only solution possible for making a dream really come true,there can not be any driving force from outside that drive us towards our real goal but it is the strength  within...
External enviornment and people around us can either motivate or create hurdles for us..but if the spark wothin us is lit if we are determined  enough from inside...nothing can deviate  us from our goal...
It is our own weaknesses  that over power us and not the external factors..It is true that external things and people can  either weaken or enhance our moral but if we are not motivated enough  from deep within  they can not effect us or stop us...
"We are fully responsible  for our own lives..we should stop blaming others and circumstances  for our failures..."
External factors and  people acting  against us can some how delay our goals but to stop pursuing  them is always our own decision  because  instead of  trying harder we simply decided  to stop..
We have to choose  between  continuing  to live a failed purposeless  life or keep trying to achieve  what we really crave for and love to do and achieve...Choice  is entirely  ours..think about it..🤔🤔